Hello my lovelies. Have you had a good weekend? How are you feeling? I hope you are staying on top of things.
I had a visit to the doctors at the end of last week. It was rather depressing in some ways as she said that I really needed to have counselling and there was only so much that the medication can do. Yes, I know, and it's not my fault the mental health services have taken 3 months to offer me an appointment! However, there's no point in vexing my frustration, I know that there is much demand for their services and there are people far, far worse than me. I left feeling as though I shouldn't have gone and guilty that I was making a fuss about nothing. However, I am trying to keep in mind that this is a symptom of the depression.
The upshot is that she's increased my beta blockers and I have had a positive few days! It would be a lie to say the days are without challenge, but I am feeling quite a lot better. I am really hoping that this positivity sticks. I have managed to open the curtains every day, clear up a bit, smile and start to tackle the current big fear that is Christmas.
I've had tonsillitis for almost 2 weeks now. In one tonsil. It just won't clear up, frustratingly. Also, on Saturday, I got mauled by a very cute little kitty that came to our catflap. I tried to befriend him and he went for me - he was hanging off my arm by his teeth, with all four sets of claws stuck into me! I have a sore arm now, at one point it was quite sore and infected, but it's seeming to clear up now.
Would you like to see my Christmas making list? Would you? Honestly? It's quite a corker! However, putting it together has cheered me right up, ironically. I love making things and having a big list to choose from - and the excuse to sit down and make due to excess of said list - is making me warm and fuzzy.
OK - here goes:
| Mum throw |
| Mother in Law throw |
| Washcloths x 3 |
| Drawstring bags x 3 |
| Bottle home made beer |
| Home made bramble jam |
| Baz's willy warmer |
| Baz's alien scarf |
| Pauline bag / scarf |
| Phoebe beret |
| Little Red Riding Hood dressing up bag |
| Cookie in Jar |
| Ripple blanket |
| Charlie's gloves |
| Fishing game |
| Hobby horse |
| Babette blanket |
| Prince Charming dressing up bag |
| Felt food |
| Dom scarf |
| Dom work cushion |
| The Cottage applique |
| Charlie knitted teddy |
| Dad socks |
|
Grandad socks
|
I have made a lot of progress with Christmas, which is one huge weight off my mind as I was starting to feel quite panicky. With me not working money is really very tight around here. We really are going to have to do things quite cheaply, although I really do love the make do and mend spirit, so that's OK by me.
I have made a spreadsheet (Dom approved!) of all the presents we need to buy. This year I bought several as I saw them cheaply, which is saving us a fortune! I will certainly do that again. Also, making your own presents is a good way of shaving off a few £££ from the bill. Anyway, everyone has a budget, and now a list of every gift they will have. I must, must, MUST stick to this list and not pick up bits and pieces as I go along. I am terrible at this. Anyway, for everyone, including Dom and the boys, we're looking at ust shy of £300. Still a fortune, huh?
My secret plan is to make £300 from selling things on Ebay, thus making it a money neutral Christmas. We really could do with the space too. So we win on both counts. I am so determined to make it work this year.
Righto, Charlie wants his breakfast so I had better go. Lots of love to you all. Big hugs.
Claire x
